Thursday, September 5, 2013

Dear Scale.... I hate you....




I break up with my scale frequently...VERY frequently.  We definitely have a love/hate relationship, although hate/hate relationship may be more fitting.  To tell you the truth, I haven't stepped on the scale in months and I have no intention of getting on it any time soon.

I'm sure many of you can relate.  You start out strong.  Workouts are going great.  You are making great food choices.  And the next thing you  know, you are down 2 pounds!  SCORE!!  That just motivates you even more.  The following week is just as good and you are down another few pounds.  All goes well like this for awhile until one day you step on that scale and it tells you that you've gained 5 pounds.  WHAT THE... (you fill in the blank)!  You step off the scale and then step back on... maybe your feet placement was wrong... yes... that's it!  So you re-position when you step back on.  NO CHANGE (like moving your toe a half an inch was really going to make a difference)!  Well... maybe the settings are  messed up or the battery needs changed.  So you flip it over, mess around with some buttons, maybe even change the battery, feeling sure that the results will now be better.  WRONG!  In your mind,  you keep saying, "This can't be right!".  Enter in the panic and a whole mix of other emotions... frustration, the overwhelming feeling that you are going to cry (and if you're me, you probably do), anger, and so many more.

The truth is that I can't handle the up and down roller coaster that is my weight.  I've dealt with it my whole life and it overwhelms me.  The scale ruins my self esteem and causes me to just head straight for the pizza and ice cream when it doesn't show me what I want to see.  I say to myself, "What's the point?!".  My mind starts racing and I conjure up all of these reasons why it's stupid for me to continue getting up at 4 am to workout.  I tell myself that I might as well eat those wings that are staring me in the face.  I mean... I'm just going to gain weight anyway, right?  WRONG!

I'm not perfect at eating and I'm not perfect at working out.  But I did promise myself to do my best at living a healthy lifestyle.  That's why I can't give up... and this is why the scale and I have broken up.  Honestly, when the scale blares that big red number at me, I swear it blinks the word "FAT" "FAT" "FAT" and I don't need that in my life.  I stay focused on my future when I stay away from that evil scale, so that's the best option for me.  I don't need a constant reminder that I haven't reached my goal yet. I already know that. Let's be honest.  If you had a friend that came to your house everyday, told you what a loser you were, and made you feel bad about yourself, you would get rid of them, right?  Well that's how I feel about my scale. We have a bad relationship, so I've eliminated it from my life...for now.

Many will argue that you need to see what progress you are making and that you need to use the scale to measure it.  To a point, I agree.  Yes... the scale is one way to measure.  I wholeheartedly believe that you need to weigh yourself for a starting point and check back periodically.  But I also think that stepping on the scale daily and obsessing over that number is bad.  There are other ways to measure.  Inches lost.  Clothing fitting differently. Overall feeling of getting stronger and healthier each day.

So, yes, the scale and I will get back together someday.  But for now, I'm just focusing on making myself healthier and stronger.  I'm making healthy food choices and I'm making a point to stay on track with my workouts.  And that's good enough for me. Everyone is different, so do what works best for you.  Ultimately, it's your journey...no one else's.



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